Elk Grove News Minute - Our 2024 Elk Grove predictions; What are yours?
What does 2024 have in store for the city of Elk Grove? | As 2023 gives way to 2024, we’ve pulled out our crystal ball and will make a f...
https://www.elkgrovenews.net/2023/12/our-2024-elk-grove-predictions-what-are.html
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| What does 2024 have in store for the city of Elk Grove? | |
As 2023 gives way to 2024, we’ve pulled out our crystal ball and will make a few predictions for the new year.
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I predict 2024 will be a memorable year for Elk Grove.
10. Five fast food drive-thrus, three Asian fusion restaurants, and two new gourmet cookie shops will open.
9. The City will issue 18 misdemeanor citations to residents who failed to lawfully place their food scraps in the proper trash bins.
8. The City will hire David Copperfield & Associates who will claim they have discovered the magic trick for solving the City's worsening traffic congestion problem.
7. The City will award a $20 million grant (or, $2 millon/urinal) to Dust Bowl Brewery for the City's first toilet-to-tap water recycling project
6. The City Council will begin providing closed captioning to their meeting broadcasts for those who prefer to hit the mute button.
5. The City will be featured on the cover of Liability Insurers Monthly in recognition of their contribution to the liability insurance industry and their slew of claims.
4. The City's Economic Development Department will begin offering used cars for sale online. City residents who purchase a car will be eligible for a raffle prize--a 1971 Ford Pinto.
3. The City Planning Department will amend the zoning ordinance to allow smaller parking spaces in retail parking lots.
2. The City Council will begin discussion on how to pay for the zoo by issuing Bobbie Bonds (not to be confused with the baseball player) and a City currency--Doan Dollars.
1. All City Council and Mayoral campaign flyers will promise greater transparency, greater public safety, hiring more police officers, and fixing the traffic congestion.
Happy New Year!
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